Thursday, September 13, 2012

Damned For All Time / Blood Money

Introducing Richard 'Reggie' Jones & The Division of the Damned

Ask anyone what they remember about April 5th, 2012, and they will probably reply, 'Wasn't that the day Russian businessman Victor Bout was sentenced to 25 years in prison for smuggling weapons to the Colombian FARC guerilla movement?' Others may point out that Malawi's President Bingu wa Mutharika was taken to Lilongwe's intensive care unit after a cardiac arrest. [Shouldn't be driving around in sports cars at his age - Ed.] Only a few will recall that Umberto Bossi resigned as the head of the Italian Northern League following a corruption scandal; and spare a thought for poor Dominican military general, Pedro Bartolom√© Benoit, who passed away at the ripe old age of 91. In brief, April 5th 2012 was a black day all round for the B people of this world.

BUT let us not forget that April 5th 2012 is also the day that Richard Rhys Jones decided to mark my 50th birthday celebrations by releasing his debut novel on our beloved Amazon:

Quick as a flash, I blew out the candles on my cake and proceeded to download Reggie's masterpiece to my Kindle - 'Please confirm your purchase'... 'Are you sure?'... 'It's your money, mate'...-, where it remains unread to this day. But that's another story. 

So, anyway, where were we? Well, not only is Richard 'Reggie' a wonderful writer, he's also a fantastic friend and superb support to his confused cantankerous colourful colleagues over on Tim Brooke-Taylor Street. I could write 20 pages here, but I'll spare Reggie the blushes.

And, to cut a very long story short, Reggie has been running a series of interviews with his colleagues over on his boring bloody brilliant blog, though modesty forbids him from interviewing himself. So, it seemed only fair to me to invite him to answer his own questions here on my blog. Needless to say, Reggie jumped at the opportunity - 'Do you think anyone will read it?' 'Not if we're lucky'... - and here goes my unedited* copy and paste:

*If there are any spelling mistakes, factual errors or rude words, please don't shoot the messenger.

1.) Tell us about yourself

Well, I'm in my mid forties and originally come from Colwyn Bay, the Jewel of Wales that sits between those two "broken-toilet" scrap heaps, Rhyl and Llandudno. I left there aged 16 to join the army and sort of never went back. I now live in Lower Saxony, Germany with my wife, two kids and two cats. God knows how I arrived here, I haven't a clue myself.

2.) What genre do you specialise in?

Horror mainly... well actually only horror. I tried my hand at Romance once but my keyboard had a headache so I left it. I'll just stick with what I'm comfortable with :-)

3.) What's your inspiration?

My inspiration is to make enough money to leave this ghetto. I yearn to walk away from the drive by shootings, the drug dealers, the gangs... and that's just the kindergarten.

4.) Who is your favourite author, why and did he/she inspire you to write in any way?

My fave author is easily... not sure really, there are so many of them. Ken Follett, (is that spelt right?) is a goody, Robert Harris, Bernard Cornwall, Dr. Zeus. All of them good in their own way, none of them boring, especially that last one.

5.) How do you feel about Taylor?

Taylor kicks bottom! No, seriously, it does. I'm so impressed with how everyone is and I'm proud to be a part of it.
Taylor, you ROCK, baby.

6.) What are your plans?

To write this, eat something, mow the lawn and then watch Midsomer Murders tonight.

7.) Go for it, sell your work.

Roll up, roll up, Eels eyelids, powdered gonads, quails knuckles get 'em while they're 'ot, they're laaaaverly! Eels eyelids, powdered gonads, quails knuckles...
Oh! Wrong work, sorry.

Feel free to pay my way out of this God forsaken ghetto by buying my weighty, lovingly crafted tome at this link:

Thanks for having me Mike, (not in the Biblical sense of the word) and I look forward to reading your answers on my Blog some day soon.

Sir, you are a scoundrel and a cad and I gladly salute you for it ;-)

Now, that wasn't nearly so bad as you expected, was it? If you'd like to know more about Reggie's work - or simply see a photo of a girl Reggie fancies - there's another great interview here


  1. Well...if this doesn't send Reg's sales sky-rocketing I don't know what will!

    I'll spread this around a bit.

    Not sure about Midsomer Murders horror writers watch such stuff? Although there is, I admit, a certain sort of horror when the realisation hits that it's the best show on TV that night.

  2. Absolute Magic Mike and Reggie. The new age Morecambe and Wise? I've read it Mike so streets ahead of you. It really is a great book. Make time when you can. x

  3. No Mike, stop now, so much praise and so little ego to enjoy it with...
    Cheers mate, I'll spread this like I did my herpes, you'll be on the news by teatime!

  4. Purely out of curiosity, Reggie, how many cats do you *really* have? I've noticed that the number varies depending on who's interviewing you :)

  5. One now, mate.
    Carlos did a runner, sadly.